Are you trying to kill your mother? Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023)
Group of us were sitting underneath a staircase in the back of a bar huddled over the only table that would fit all six of us when my friend asks another for something in Spanish.
“A what??” Asks the second friend, Cuban.
First friend, Salvadoreñan, repeats while pointing at a straw. “A pajilla.”
“You mean an ABSORBENTE?” the Cuban says a little too condescendingly, because across from them the Colombian goes “Not a napkin dumbass, a pitillo” to which the Puerto Rican snaps “It’s a fuckin sorbeto, a pitillo is a joint” to which I screamed “Why do your people refer to it as Italian ice cream it’s a god damn popote what is wrong with all y'all” and that’s the night when we realized there’s 11 different ways to say “straw” in Spanish
This reminds me of the time I (a Floridian) was in a voice chat with A New Yorker, A Texan, A Canadian, a Brit, an Aussie, and a Brazilian; and the Brazilian was the only one not having any trouble understanding what anyone was saying.
Anonymous:
i hope that in the future humans become migratory creatures who move between continents on a seasonal basis, like the birbs
Anon I’m guessing you’ve never moved in your life if you would be willing to do that twice a year. I’d much rather we become hibernators and let everyone sleep through winter
Also like I grew up in Wisconsin and there is very much a population of retired old people who do this by having a second house in Florida that they spend winters at. We call them snowbirds and I imagine if I lived in Florida I would hate them
Glad we can all agree that these people who own two houses and leave one empty half the year fucking suck
Anonymous: 
